Friday, October 26, 2007

Awesome

You think you know how to tie one on?
The record for history's largest cocktail belongs to British Lord Admiral Edward Russell. In 1694, he threw an officer's party that employed a garden's fountain as the punch bowl.

The concoction? A mixture that included 250 gallons of brandy, 125 gallons of Malaga wine, 1,400 pounds of sugar, 2,500 lemons, 20 gallons of lime juice, and 5 pounds of nutmeg.

A series of bartenders actually paddled around in a small wooden canoe, filling up guests' cups. Not only that, but they had to work in 15-minute shifts to avoid being overcome by the fumes and falling overboard.

The party continued nonstop for a full week, pausing only briefly during rainstorms to erect a silk canopy over the punch to keep it from getting watered down. In fact, the festivities didn't end until the fountain had been drunk completely dry.

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

BUT, BUT, BUT IT'S FOR TEH CHILDREN! WHAT ABOUT THE CHILDREN!!!

SCHIP, the veto explained.
The Framers would have insisted on nothing less, as reflected in the Constitution's Health Care Clause. Oh, wait. The Constitution has no Health Care Clause. Nor does it include any other provision that authorizes Congress to spend taxpayers' money on health insurance for the children of the working poor, the grandparents of the middle class, the nephews of the super-rich, or the kin of any other socioeconomic group.

Still, Bartlett and Bush deserve some credit for resisting the expansion of a highly popular program that never should have been created to begin with, especially since they knew they'd be accused of being stingy child haters. They would deserve more credit if they applied their avowed principles a little more consistently, in which case the charges of cruel penny-pinching would be less credible.

Read the whole thing.

Saturday, October 13, 2007

Nobel Peace Prize? Feh . . .

If Al Gore can win it, so can I.
But the award is as likely to go to a current or former government official: a George Marshall, a Willy Brandt, a Mikhail Gorbachev, a Jimmy Carter. Some of those statesmen aren't exactly pacifists, which leads us to the third and easiest way to win the Peace Prize:

3. Kill a lot of people, then stop. In 1973, the Nobel Peace Prize was shared by Henry Kissinger and Le Duc Tho. Kissinger's CV included the "secret" bombing of Cambodia and the "Christmas" bombing of North Vietnam; just a month before his prize was announced, he was complicit in the coup that installed a brutal dictatorship in Chile. So why did he win? Because he and Tho had reached a truce to end the Vietnam War. Tho wasn't a particularly peaceful man either, but at least he had the common courtesy to refuse the award.


Read it all.